First, a disclaimer: The suggestions herein are for entertainment purposes only. They must never be used as a substitute for common sense, or for any illegal or immoral purpose.
Where to find the business cards: The first step is similar to the ancient recipe for rabbit stew:
First, you must catch a rabbit. In this case, you must first catch some business cards. But not just any old business cards. You need the kind with foil, colors, raised printing and/or engraved. You can’t make this kind at home so look elsewhere.
One way to get these cards is just to show up at an office with some lame excuse and ask for a card from the butcher, baker, beggar, thief (aka IRS), doctor, lawyer, or tribal chief. Another way is to keep an eye out for community bulletin boards—the kind where entrepreneurs of all colors stick their cards under the edge of the frame. Grab a few.
Or, stop in for coffee and pie in one of those restaurants where you are urged to drop your business card into a bowl. Get out some card you wanted to be rid of anyway. When no one is watching, place your card in the bowl and palm a few of the cards that are already in there. (This gets better with practice, folks!)
How to use the business cards: One way is to use them when you travel by bus, train or plane. You can be an artist, an author, or a company president for a day. Just don’t use a business card from some famous person—showing a card that says “Stephen Edwin King” won’t cut it.
Another way is when you wish to attend a conference or a seminar where you have not been invited. Perhaps you wait until the audience breaks for coffee and snacks, and then you drift back into the conference hall when the others do. In this instance you may prefer NOT to chat with others but if someone questions you, have a proper business card ready. Assuming that I were to sneak into a conference where I was not welcome, I would have a card handy that said “Consultant.” That can mean almost anything.
If any of you readers have ever used other people’s business cards for fun and games, why not leave a comment here about your experience?
Privacy blog post by JJ Luna at 1:43 PM
